Recently, on the publib listserv, there has been a “discussion” entitled You know you’re a rural librarian when. As I sit reading the additions on a daily basis I can’t help but laugh and think….’hmmm, yup. Yup. Yup. Had that happen. Damn, I can relate.’ And in discussing with a colleague recently and reading another’s blog, I can see we really do have a connection there.
So, for your reading pleasure I have listed the “You know you’re a rual librarian” entries as they have been added to the listserv as of today. YOU KNOW YOU’RE A RURAL LIBRARIAN WHEN….
delivery people bring packages to the library, not your home, irrespective of what the address says.
a patron asks to trade you either a dozen eggs or a freshly baked pie in lieu of paying a fine.
your genealogy materials are rarely used because everyone knows each other and their family history
The highway snowplow stops by the library for audio books
You’re new to the library and are given directions to the Smiths’ house that include, “Turn right at the corner where Mrs. Jones’s aunt used to live.” (You don’t know Mrs. Jones, let alone her aunt.)
You sometimes get to work late because of the large farm implements going 15 miles an hour down the two-lane county road to your library.
You have to drive behind the herd of sheep that have to be moved down the main highway.
You’ve heard gunshots in the distance because it is turkey hunting season.
The explanation for overdues is ‘there was overtime at the (produce processing plant) and Mama didn’t have time to bring my books back.’
The fire engines go roaring by several time a day because it is pasture burning season and it got out of hand.
Someone drops by to make sure you are all right when you work late because they know we should be closed, and then offer to walk you to your car
Automotive repair manuals are filed under landscaping.
If the two books enjoying the highest checkout in the library are The Chicken Health Book and How to do Your Own Divorce in Texas, or
If a perfectly valid reason for calling off work is “my road is flooded out again.”
You get to work in the morning and the bunnies scatter from the parking lot as you pull in.
You’re late to work because you were stuck behind a tractor – or a combine.
When you’re not home, the UPS man knows to drop off your package at the library.
You are happy to adjust employees’ schedules around their county fair competitions.
Your whole area’s Internet connection goes down because a farmer’s horse dies. (The farmer used a backhoe to dig a hole for burial and accidentally cut a cable in the process.)
You can correctly identify the farm implements you see on the road & the owners.
You carry bits of paper in your pocket when going to the grocery store, etc., because you know someone will request a book, or have a question.
You check out and take books to an elderly client because she kinda, sorta threaten to tell your Dad if you didn’t.
A firefighter stops a young vandal from damaging your vehicle by saying “No, that car belongs to one of the librarians.”
Your library has a hitchin’ post.
Your library has a watering trough.
The grandfather across the street is your security system
You list the names of probable readers next to every book you order (in the order of their VIP standing or watch out!), and if there aren’t enough possible readers you won’t be ordering it.
You know every card-holder by name, and could take a stab at age and ancestry for two generations in either direction.
When you walk to work (because you CAN), every car stops to ask if you need a ride and what happened to your car?
You refuse to issue a card to Billy Bob jr. because the picture ID he brought in is his father’s, and you know this because you know where both he and his father live, and the address on the driver’s license is the father’s.
Patrons are personally affronted if you ask to see their library card at checkout
People in the checkout line hand you a reserve request written on the back of their grocery list.
People tell the town manager you work too much because they saw your car at the library after 9 P.M.
You stop at yard sales to buy movies for the library.
You have a network of fellow scavengers who save Coke, Pepsi and Powerade caps (or Campbell soup labels) so you can redeem the points for more stuff for the library.
Your fingerprints are on every item in the library.
You debate weeding a title you just know cousin Emma will hate you for, but do it anyway.
You’re on the delivery service, but drop off an ILL pouch in the next town after hours because you’re going there anyway to do some grocery shopping.
You visit other libraries and the first place you go is their used book shelf.
There is a bigger library that has adopted you, and you have done the same for a smaller library.
You have done story hour while simultaneously checking out books and answering a reference question over the phone.
If people bring by new babies AND pets to show the staff
If your bookmobile has had to wait for a flock of sheep to clear the road
If your bookmobile has mowed down a flock of guineas (They saw the sheep in time, but the guineas never had a chance)
If staff members know the grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins of the kid checking out books.
If you know and call the owner when a dog wanders into the library.
If staff members can walk to any store downtown during their break.
If patrons bring you vegetables from their gardens.
The books on raising goats, sheep and chickens circulated more than the books on fine arts and travel. Your patrons know what the Firefox books are. . .
You not only continue to circ VHS, you buy them at used books sales & yard sales because your patrons still want them.
People tie up their horse-wagons and buggies to the bike stand in front of your library (It’s an Amish thing)
Your patrons like you to place holds on titles for them – even before they know they want that book. (Proactive reader’s advisory)
You are the town’s copier service, fax service, UPS pickup spot, meeting room, community service outlet, internet café, and perhaps even the coffee shop (vending machine anyone?)
You can see trees, open spaces and livestock from your library’s front door (mooooo)
You are The Community Center for your village or town
If your elevation is greater than your population.
If, when you get a phone call asking for the Reference desk, Acquisitions department, Overdues, Children’s Services, ILL, etc., you say “I can help you with that.”
If you get stopped in the grocery store by people who tell you they have overdue books or fines, and want to take care of it right there next to the lettuce.
If you invite all the patrons in for hot soup and coffee when the power is off in neighborhoods during the winter.
If people stop you in the grocery store (or dry cleaners, or restaurant, or…) to return books or make requests for books.
If you have to drive at least 10 miles to buy a gallon of milk.
If the children from summer reading bring their report cards in to show you and invite you to their graduations.
If you know every kid on the high school football team by the kind of books they read when they were in summer reading.
If you and all your staff cry when someone tells you of the passing of along-time patron.
If you have ever installed a water-heater or fixed a major appliance yourself, or with the help of a spouse, because you could not afford to call a repairman or the nearest one is more than an hour away.
If patrons call and ask you to renew books and you don’t have to ask their names because you recognize their voices.
If the directions given to outreach staff involve turning next to the big barn with the red chickens in the yard.
If you’ve ever had a patron drop off house plants for you to keep while they had an extended hospital stay.
You troubleshoot for everyone in the community’s computer problems, not just your own.
You loan your personal books out to supplement the library collection.
You repurpose computers until they are useless to the library, and then you repurpose them to another non-profit or family in need…
…same with books
…and occasionally other fixtures
You back up your school librarian, whose job is constantly in question, and is wearing far too many hats these days…
Your Friends group is remodeling the library bathrooms…themselves, and the Board members help move shelving, wash windows, plant annuals, and paint walls…
You have volunteer maintenance folks…
People bring you lunch and dinner because they know on busy days you don’t eat because meals are not on the schedule…
Patrons subscribe to a periodical to ensure the library has it…
When school gets out, your patronage (and bathroom use) double (or triple) and you know everyone coming in (mostly)…
You open early and stay open late when it is too hot for living outside and most people don’t have air conditioning…
The deer outside outnumber the people inside. Or geese, or ducks…and they should know better to chase the Swans out on the ICE.
You see a fox run down the street after close and make a left at the corner of the library to go hunting …
People call the library for the number to….anyone, anywhere in town….
If parents call to tell you “send John home, it’s supper time”….and then call back 15 minutes later because that’s how long it takes for him to walk home and John isn’t there yet